Trump’s final four

the apprentice girls nakedLast week on THE APPRENTICE, The Donald fired The Jewish Virgin to whittle his pool of schmos down to four. They are The Russian Stripper, The Gimp, Sorority Girl and Squidward. Personally, I’m rooting for The Russian Stripper. She’s awesome, plus if your mere presence causes guys to kill people, you would make a great fit in Trump’s cutthroat organization and work in his phallic building.

Meanwhile, in celebration of the final four, here are four phrases I’d love to see banned from THE APPRENTICE. Week in, week out, season in, season out, they all spout the same damn unoriginal sports analogies they picked up from business school and thought made them sound Really Smart:
1. At the end of the day
2. Step up to the plate
3. Bring to the table (and its abbreviation, “Bring it”)
4. I have what it takes

4 Responses to “Trump’s final four”

  1. Allan Says:

    I had no idea she had such a sordid past! Cool. Still, I’m all about The Gimp. Sure everyone expects Trump to pick his first black apprentice this go around, but I think it would be a victory for clutzy hot brunettes if he gives it to the Sandra Bullock clone in the crutches.

  2. Eric L Says:

    Yeah, I wish I had known all of this ahead of time. I knew I liked her for some reason. There’s no way the black guy will lose, but just to mess with everyone I’d like to see Trump pick the biggest goofball there (this time it would be that Markus guy)and string them along to the very end. His firing seems to be pretty arbitrary at times anyways, he may as well have some fun with it.

  3. Rod Lott Says:

    For weeks I have said this would come down to a Russian Stripper vs. Squidward showdown. I think in any other year, Russian Stripper would win hands (and pants) down, but you know he’s gotta pick a minority sometime, and this one is the Anti-Omarosa, so it’s all good.

    Oh, and personally, I thought The Gimp looked more like Shania Twain than Sandra Bullock.

  4. mr skin Says:

    The trailer for Premonition with Bullock looks like a must see in March!

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